He's back!

[anolinde]

[mood: Uncomfortable]
[music: Because of You- Kelly Clarkson]

So, I'm online minding my own business yet again when my stalker IMs me.

Person: hey
Me: Feel like telling me who you are yet?
Person: i missed you in the cafeteria monday
Me: Shame.
Me: You could have, you know, come up to me.
Person: well i like watching you

That's kind of sweet... in a creepy way.

Me: So you'd rather watch me than talk to me?
Person: no...
Me: Then why don't you talk to me?
Person: i dont want to do it infront of youre friends
Person: you talk to them about me
Person: you tell them im a perv

Now that was a little freaky.

Me: Do you know that for a fact?
Person: well you put our conversation on your livejournal
Me: You have to admit that you were being perverted.
Person: well...i can dream cant i
Me: *sigh* Look, you have major avoidance issues... Why don't you just talk to me or something?
Me: Like, in person?
Me: It's not like you're some weird axe-murderer, so I'm not afraid of you at all.
Person: thats why i wanted to meet you in the cafeteria....
Me: Look, I don't even know who you are.
Me: And if you like me, telling me that I have a nice ass and that you want to fuck me and that you want to meet me in front of the cafeteria is not the way to go.
Person: ok, well i dont want to fuck you, well i do but.....not in a bad way
Me: Um... well, I suppose that's better than most guys.
Me: So, who are you?
Person: i told you, my name is jeff
Me: Jeff who?
Person: [last name]
Me: ...
Me: You're not in the phone book.
Person: so...
Me: Why are you lying?
Person: im not lying
Person: why are you looking me up in the phone book
Me: To see if you're lying.
Me: I don't know anyone named Jeff [last name].
Me: I'm not good with names, but still.
Person: well what phone book are you looking in
Me: [middle school I went to].
Person: well that might explain it, im from [middle school in different town]
Me: Is your name really Jeff?
Me: Like, is this some kind of stupid joke?
Me: Cause I don't remember doing anything to any [other middle school] kid to get this.
Person: what makes you think i youve done something other than look attractive, and smart

That was really sweet. ^_^ Even though, you know, the whole situation's kind of weird.

Me: Because I don't see why anyone would go out of their way to talk to me on AIM but not talk to me in real life.
Person: ive told you why
Person: i wish you would understand me
Me: Look, my friends aren't that bad...
Me: I mean, granted, yes, a little hyper on occasion...
Person: well anyway, you;d think im ugly
Me: Cause I'm superficial like that, of course.
Person: no ones ever wanted me
Me: Join the club.
Person: i want you...and at least you dont have to worry about being circumcized

Now I'm just thinking, WAY TOO MUCH INFO.

Me: ?
Me: Okay...
Person: every time ive ever been about to be with a girl shes looked at me and left
Person: ...its small
Person signed off at 6:40:45 PM.

Seriously, THE HELL?! It's not like I'm planning on having sex anytime soon... Jeez, is sex all guys think about? *le sigh*

I dunno... I bet somewhere a group of guys (or girls) are laughing their heads off at me. Heh.

ETA: I just looked him up in my school's phonebook, and he's not there. Supporting my joke theory. :P

Comments

[captain-lanie.livejournal.com]

That's crazy.

Sweet, but crazy.

[anolinde.livejournal.com]

Oh, quite.