The Rohan Pride Trilogy

[anolinde]

As some of you may or may not know, I've spent the past seven years (almost eight... O.O) working on a massively long Lord of the Rings fanfiction. Called The Rohan Pride Trilogy - don't judge, I was in sixth grade - it's actually more of a quadrilogy, since the "epilogue" I'm currently writing is longer than the trilogy itself.

A reader on FanFiction.Net recently asked me via Formspring if I would ever upload .pdfs of the Rohan Pride Trilogy, and, since I coincidentally had just done so for a friend, I decided to post them here for anyone to read.

General Summary: Until her twelfth birthday, Gúthwyn daughter of Éomund had everything: her siblings, Éowyn and Éomer; her cousin, Théodred; her uncle, Théoden. But when she is kidnapped and sold into slavery, she is exposed to a dark, comfortless world and forced to endure unspeakable atrocities. When she at last escapes from the horrors of Isengard and Mordor, leaving behind the body of the man she loves, she finds that it is not so easy to outrun the memories. Only with the help of her family and friends—and possibly a husband—can she finally begin to let go of her fears.

Warnings: Rape and torture scenes. Most of these are in the first book, although there are periodic flashbacks throughout the trilogy and the epilogue. Some of these may be triggering for victims. [Note: There are no individual chapter warnings on the .pdf files, though I am working on adding them to the chapters on FanFiction.Net.]

Part I: Alone
The first part of The Rohan Pride Trilogy. Taken from her family at the age of twelve, Gúthwyn spends her teenage years in slavery. The horrors she witnesses culminate in one devastating assignment from the Dark Lord: find the One Ring and kill the Halfling who carries it. Gúthwyn has no desire to assist the Enemy, but if she wants the freedom of her children she has no other choice.
download @ MediaFire | mirror @ MegaUpload

Part II: Reunions
Her mission discovered by the Fellowship, and forced to help find Merry and Pippin by a furious Aragorn, Gúthwyn follows the Three Hunters into the heart of Rohan... and back home. Once reunited with her family, she must help in the defense of Helm's Deep against her former master Saruman. Always in the back of her mind, however, are the children she left behind in Mordor... and the price she will pay if she does not bring the Ring to Sauron.
download @ MediaFire | mirror @ MegaUpload

Part III: Terms
As the fighting throughout Middle-earth escalates, Gúthwyn struggles to come to terms with what happened to her in Isengard and Mordor. At the same time, she makes a plan to rescue the children from Mordor—one that involves handing herself over to the Dark Lord.
download @ MediaFire | mirror @ MegaUpload

The epilogue is not currently available as a .pdf, since I need to go through it and get rid of the notes I sometimes write to myself within the chapters - not to mention the ten unpublished chapters that I've already written. =)

For the purpose of keeping related things together, I've decided to repost the mix I made for this story here. Enjoy!

{01} Anything But Ordinary
Avril Lavigne

To walk within the lines
Would make my life so boring
I want to know that I
Have been to the extreme

“You are a girl!” Tun scoffed, earning a laugh from the other boys. Gúthwyn’s face grew red and furious until she had forgotten what Théodred had taught her about using her skills wisely. “How’s this for a girl?” she demanded, raising her fist and punching him in the stomach. The boy gasped in pain, bending over and clutching his abdomen as Gúthwyn watched triumphantly and the others murmured in surprise. ♪

{02} Precious Illusions
Alanis Morissette

But this won't work as well as the way it once did
Cause I want to decide between survival and bliss
And though I know who I'm not I still don't know who I am
But I know I won't keep on playing the victim

Éowyn and Éomer were dead. Although Gúthwyn had already told the other slaves this, acknowledging it in her mind made it seem real. She realized that all along she had only been lying to herself, praying that her siblings would come back and rescue her. ♪

{03} Stupid
Sarah McLachlan

How stupid could I be
A simpleton could see
That you’re no good for me
But you’re the only one I see

The slap seemed to come from thin air, yet she felt the stinging on her cheek and realized that Haldor had hit her. She gasped in shock and recoiled from him, staring up in horror at his eyes. They were blazing with a fire she had never seen before. ♪

{04} Damaged
Plumb

I didn’t say all the things that I wanted to say
And you can’t take back what you’ve taken away
Cause I feel you, I feel you near me

Whenever she thought of what Haldor had done to her, every inch of her body burned in shame and humiliation. She began having nightmares, waking up to remember Haldor’s hot breath on her face, his hands roaming over her body, feeling the pain and disgrace so sharply that tears would form in her eyes again. ♪

{05} Going Under
Evanescence

Now I will tell you what I’ve done for you
Fifty thousand tears I’ve cried
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you
And you still won’t hear me

Almost half a year had passed since Gúthwyn had been taken to the Black Land. Half a year of uncertainty, humiliation, and terror. Haldor still sought to break her with relentless ferocity, and slowly but surely it was working. She was called to his tent every week, forced to endure worse and worse punishments as the months went by. When she returned from these in the middle of the night, curling frightfully up beside Hammel and Haiweth, she could not sleep for fear of him coming back for her. ♪

{06} Haunted
Evanescence

I can smell you alive
Your heart pounding in my head
Watching me, wanting me
I can feel you pull me down

“Why does he do it?” Gúthwyn whispered. “I feel it all the time... No matter where I am, I cannot escape.” ♪

{07} Field of Innocence
Evanescence

I still remember the world
From the eyes of a child
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what I know now

Gúthwyn, in turn, never said much about what was going on in the present, but spoke often of her days in Rohan. It was evident, just from the faraway look her face got, the softer quality of her voice, that she was deeply in love with her land. Borogor learned of her siblings, who could have been nothing short of gods from the way she extolled them. ♪

{08} You'll Be in My Heart
Phil Collins

For one so small, you seem so strong
My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm
This bond between us can’t be broken
I will be here, don’t you cry

Borogor held her tightly, afraid that if he let go she would fall. Ilúvatar, he thought as she sobbed into his chest, help me protect her, if it is in my power to do so. ♪

{09} Ten-Sided Ambush
Shigeru Umebayshi (House of Flying Daggers)

Instrumental

Borogor was falling forever, the bow slipping softly out of his hands, time and space suspended as his body hovered over the ground. And then he was lying peacefully upon the path, his eyes closed as if in sleep, but like the passing of his brother there would be no awakening. ♪

{10} Remember Me
Josh Groban (Troy)

Remember, I will still be here
As long as you hold me in your memory
Remember, when your dreams have ended
Time can be transcended
Just remember me

Gúthwyn wondered if Borogor was watching her now, if his spirit was guiding her from the Halls of Mandos where mortals lingered after their deaths. If it were, what would he think of her now, a pathetic little figure who cried when her older sister grew angry with her? What would he do if he were at her side? Would he gently stroke her hair, press soft kisses on her skin? Caress her without threat, whisper away her sadness? She groaned and rolled over, as if trying to shake off the idea, but it was too late. Borogor had joined her in her bed, his strong arms wrapping around her and drawing her towards him. She struggled to resist the fantasy and yet she did not desire it to end, for that would mean him leaving her. She yearned for the sensation of his lips brushing against the back of her neck, for the feeling of his hands on her bare flesh—he would know where he could touch her, where contact would be welcome. ♪

{11} Someday We'll Know
Mandy Moore and Jonathan Foreman (A Walk to Remember)

Someday we’ll know if love can move a mountain
Someday we’ll know why the sky is blue
Someday we’ll know why I wasn’t meant for you

Gúthwyn smiled, injecting as much dignity into the gesture as possible. Her mind, however, raced back to countless practice sessions with Borogor, who had allowed her to attack him when the mood struck her. He always fought back, restraining nothing; likewise, she had withheld none of her fury from him. As she recalled their countless skirmishes, the vast majority of which she had won, it pained her to realize how foolish she had been in not seeing the love that they held for each other. Even when she was a child she had not wrestled so ferociously, so intimately—yet she had with Borogor. ♪

{12} What Have You Done
Within Temptation

I know I’d better stop trying
You know that there’s no denying
I won’t show mercy on you now

A smile came to Haldor’s face. “Then it is goodbye, Gúthwyn,” he said, and a ringing noise sounded through the clearing as he withdrew his own sword. It was of far better make than hers. “For you will not leave these woods alive.” Out of the corner of her eye, Gúthwyn saw Aragorn moving closer with his own sword at the ready. “Stay out of this!” she yelled at him, holding her blade up higher as she prepared to face Haldor for what would be the last fight of her life. She was not going to let the Ranger stop them. “Good, good,” Haldor murmured, his cold eyes gleaming. “Are you ready, Gúthwyn?” ♪

{13} What Hurts the Most
Rascal Flatts

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doing it
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still harder getting up, getting dressed, living with this regret

As Tun was parrying a blow, he happened to hear Gúthwyn’s laughter. The musical sound of it reminded him of how she had once giggled at his jokes. Before he knew it, his sword was knocked out of his hands and the pommel of Erkenbrand’s had delivered a sharp rap on his head. “What was that for?” he grumbled, bending over to retrieve Forstrang. “You have a wife now,” Erkenbrand pointed out in a low tone of voice. “And it is not Gúthwyn.” ♪

{14} October
Pristina

You filled the sky the day we met
And now the stars all shine through you
And though my dress is worn and grey
I still dance every dance for you

Her mind wandered into the future that she would never have with Borogor. She was certain that a child had been in it; that if the Valar had granted her his love, she would now be the mother of a boy like Elfwine, or a girl like Haiweth—or even both. The days of her life would be passing by with her and Borogor side by side, watching over their children during the day and kissing each other at night. ♪

{15} Your Embrace
Shakira

My life is full of people
But you’re my only friend, my best friend
Hope it isn’t too late to say I love you

Gúthwyn glanced away from the couple, and her eyes fell upon an even more disheartening sight: Éowyn leading Faramir towards the musicians. She was laughing at something he had said, and as she looked at them her sister placed a kiss on his cheek. He responded with an even softer one on her lips; brief in duration, but tender and caring. Éowyn’s cheeks turned a faint shade of pink. Gúthwyn winced, suddenly overwhelmed by a rush of memories about Borogor—his body as it sank to the foliage, and how lifeless his lips beneath hers had been. ♪

{16} Flinch
Alanis Morissette

How long can a girl be tortured by you
How long before my dignity is reclaimed
And how long can a girl be haunted by you
Soon I’ll grow up and I won’t even flinch at your name

Haldor had been dead for more than three years, and he had not bedded her in four; could she not now begin to forget all that he had done to her? Why could she not put him aside? You know why, a voice inside her head replied, and she trembled, painfully aware that it was right. He had broken her—he had destroyed her innocence and pride, ripping away her dignity until there was nothing left of it. He had raped her and mocked her and toyed with her, keeping her as helpless as a mouse in a cat’s lair. Because of him, her body was ruined and her mind was a prisoner of itself. She would forever be bound to him, her thoughts invaded by him when she least expected it and when she least wanted it. She would never be free. ♪

{17} A Narnia Lullaby
Harry Gregson-Williams (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Instrumental

“I thought you might enjoy a visit from your cousin,” Haldor said as she stared down in horror at Théodred. His face was now pure white, contrasting garishly with the blood dripping down it. Once more, she went limp. Yet this time Haldor laughed, and pulled her off of her cousin. “And these…” He threw her onto the ground so that she landed between two bodies. Golden hair spilled over their shoulders. One wore red armor, while the other was clad in a blue dress… “NO!” she yelled, scrambling away from Éowyn and Éomer. “Stop it! Stop! Please!” ♪

{18} Bring Me to Life (Bonus Track)
Evanescence

How can you see into my eyes
Like open doors
Leading you down into my core
Where I’ve become so numb

A hint of things to come... ♪ download the .zip file @MediaFire